I'm A Culture Vulture & On Writing And So Forth.

My fav Boob-Toob shows
I loves to watch my British comedies like...
'My Queer Old Dean'
'Bag O' Nails'
'Dry Bagging On-The-Heath'
'How Dare You, Sir'
'Booring Fops On-The-Fanny'
'What's All This, Then'
'The Boggie Chronicles'
'Feck Right Off'

My fav smashed wood-pulp sheets with the black bits printed on them...
'The Joys Of Scrimshawing Part 2'
'Dry Bagging On The Heath'
'Catch Her In The Wry'
'The Angina Monologues'
'The Joys Of George Bernard Shawing Part 4'


I'm gonna write a book the old fashioned way - I'm gonna eschew the werd processor and go back to using a fountain pen with a huge feather on it, dipping it in the india ink and scratching word-type-things on yellowed foolscap.
Then I would feel like I'm writing something, goddammit!
Something important.
Something for the ages.
Something that will run about 1600 words and will hopefully be published in the Swank magazine Reader's Forum.

Speaking of yellowed foolscap,  this is how my stand-up act is gonna go. I just decided.
I'm going to dress up like a page boy (man) from the old days, complete with Prince Valient haircut, a foppish goatee, velvet tights, a huge feathered cap, and so forth. I'm going to stride out to center stage, unroll a huge scroll of yellowed parchment, and start reading in a loud, fruity voice with trilled 'r's, one filthy disgusting limerick after another. That's it. For 45 minutes.

"There once was a man named Dave, who kept a dead whore in his cave..."
"There once was a man from Nantuckett..."

Alright. I guess it's not that funny. What do you want from me? I'm a whorehouse, not a factory.

- Garish out